I can handle most of the gross stuff involved with parenting pretty well. I had two c-sections, survived the recovery and the post-partum disgustness that comes with being post-partum. Clots people. Clots. (Mom’s you know what I’m talking about). But then my kids get sick and I freaking lose it.
See, I used to work with animals, before I became a teacher. I was in the trenches. I would clean out cages that looked like twenty animals had diarrhea in them when it was just a tiny cute little puppy. I cleaned those cages without flinching. Poop apparently doesn’t bother me. Vomit either. Or urine. Or the really gross stuff that pops out of anal glands. I’m sorry if you just Googled anal glands, that stuff is pretty gross. I watched the vet I worked for perform surgeries. Not only surgeries, but hysterectomies where he removed infected cat uteruses. Do you know what that looks like? It’s a big long tube thing that is full of pus. I watched him do this and didn’t feel nauseas at all. As a kid, I always thought it would be the poop stuff that would get me, but I was wrong.
It’s snot. I get completely and utterly grossed out by freaking snot. I cannot stand the stuff. Elizabeth pooped in her pants, no problem. Wait, she just dug out a booger? GET AWAY FROM ME. So I dread colds. I dread them so much. I knew that with the start of preschool that illness would make it’s way into our house. It’s inevitable. They go to school and touch toys and each other with their germy hands and then the house is infected. I worked at my daughters preschool last Thursday and I got An Illness. Oh yes, it deserves capital letters.
From me, it spread to Elizabeth and then to Josie. Aside from feeling like I was drowning from all the snot, I was forced to wipe runny noses and watch in horror as my almost three year old wiped her runny nose on my shirt. And I had to do it with sympathy and love because that’s what moms DO.
It’s snot guys. I can’t stand the snot.