It happens occasionally, very occasionally in my house, but it does happen. Sometimes there’s a kid in my bed at night. I’m pretty protective of my sleep and once the young’uns are old enough to sleep in a crib/bed at night, they do so. Every move, snort, slap in the face or kick in the stomach is very disruptive. BUT. They are still young and occasionally, they end up in my bed. Last night it was the first time the 2 year old successfully slept in it; she usually just pokes me in the face and giggles at me until I give it up and put her back in her crib where she cries until she falls asleep. Last night was different.
- She wasn’t crying. She was fake crying to get attention, but stuck in what I call the two year old loop. This is the loop of wanting and not wanting something at the same time. She was exhausted but wouldn’t lie down. If I lay her down, she screamed like a banshee. Once, I put a blanket on her and she sounded like I was trying to kill her. So, she sat there, fake crying but unable to fall asleep because she WOULD NOT LIE DOWN.
- The sound she was making weighed on my ears. It sounded like the most annoying sound in the world from ‘Dumb and Dumber.’ Ok, probably not, but that’s what it sounded like to my ears at 3 am. I would have done anything to make it stop.
- My four year old needed sleep. She was hanging in there like a trooper, but when your kids share a room, one or the other is awoken by the other when there’s a problem. Elizabeth needed sleep. So now, one kid or the other was going to be in my bed regardless.
- I was cold. It’s winter and it’s 3am. We have the heat on, but it’s chilly and my feet were slowly turning into ice cubes.
- I was tired. Did I mention it’s 3am? Actually, by now it’s probably almost 4. She’s been making that sound for almost an hour.
- I tried being in the room. I put a pillow on the floor next to her and lay there, patting her, shushing her, singing to her, trying EVERYTHING to make her lie the fuck down and go to sleep. Nothing doing.
- She’s sick. This is probably the biggest reason. If she wasn’t sick, I’d leave the room (my presence was obviously only encouraging The Sound), and make her go to sleep. There was nothing wrong with her other than she wanted my attention. If she had been well, 15 minutes of her crying with no attention would have seen her fall back asleep and all would be well. But I challenge even the most stoic mother among you to ignore a sick child who obviously wants you and is coughing intermittently and can’t self-sooth because her nose is full of snot.
- She’s sick. Yep, it gets listed twice. All sick children want their parents. Who am I to argue?
- When I picked her up, she melted into me with a contented little sigh that melted my heart into disgusting goo. I stepped in it and caved. I totally caved.
- Once placed in our bed, a little hand drifted up out of the darkness and patted my arm and my back, the same way I do to sooth her, and then she patted my cheek. Jesus, she’s so sweet.
Yep, I caved because I love her so dang much and it was so worth it for the baby snuggles. She’s my last baby and the only one who really likes to cuddle. She fell asleep there with her tiny hand in mine and it was amazing.